BeYOUtiful

      

      We are not born into the world having a sense of self, it is not innate, but learned through various life experiences and encounters with other people. What does it really mean to know one's self? In my opinion, it is to know what exactly you stand for, believe in and to have a good understanding about one's own thought processes. 

   Growing up, I was always bright, opinionated and sure enough of who I was not to worry about being popular or unpopular. I never cared about being in the "in crowd" or even who liked or disliked me. In college, it was pretty much the same. I made friends early and weeded out those who I deemed to be fake or whose ideals didn't line up with mine. Now, as a woman in my mid- twenties, I have even fewer friends and could care even less than I did before. I don't too much care for people with elitest attitudes or an incessant need to be in the spotlight.

     What I've come to understand is that although I may be quite certain of who I am, what I believe, and what I stand for, others may not. Furthermore it is difficult for people who are unsure of themselves to be in the company of someone like myself or my other two friends. I have lost/dismissed a few "friends" for attempting to belittle me or make me feel < because of their own self-imposed inadequacies. 

      I never could understand why someone whom I called a friend (which is rare) would feel jealous of me or "hate on" me. In fact, it was not until others pointed it out to me that I recognized it as such and even then it was difficult to believe. I am confident, but very humble, so it was hard for me to accept that those that I may love may not have wanted the best for me. It left me bewildered and wondering to myself "how can my friend be praying for my downfall?" 

     I even had a friend once who would try to embarass me in crowds of other people because I have an extensive vocabulary or because I am filled with random "little-nobody-cares-facts" that I like to share with people. Since when was it a crime to be intelligent or be myself for that matter? 

     I feel sorry for people who equate their importance to how many likes they receive on pictures or how many followers they have on social media. I feel sorry for people who feel the need to fit in, because its fine to just be you. I've been described as a nerd, been called weird, and a geek...and I'm just fine with that. The way I see it...I'm just a fiercely ecclectic UNICORN in a world where most people strive to live up to the world's impossible standards of accepatnace. 

I say all this to say get to know yourself instead of trying your damndest to be someone you're not. 

-Ree